The next time I fall in love, I’ll know what to do. Love can be our greatest source of pleasure but also our greatest source of pain. But I am not deterred. Not bitter. Not angry – at least not anymore.
My late aunt used to say that “everyone loves to hear the ocean but no one wants to hear the roar.” Love involves work. Sacrifice. Commitment and most of all, forgiveness. If you cannot forgive, don’t bother to love.
I fell in love with false prophets; men who promised one thing and then did the complete opposite.
Life is a series of spiritual lessons that we never stop learning until the day we close our eyes. So what lessons have I learned from falling in and out of love?
- I will never talk myself into loving someone because they appear to be “nice” when I know damn well I’m not feeling them emotionally. Some people are very good actors and play their roles well.
- I will not finance someone else’s dreams only to later become a victim of its nightmare
- I will not lower my standards to make others feel comfortable
- I will not apologize for my standards; my values; or my intelligence.
- I will not “rescue” people or manage their crisis to the point of my own detriment
- I will not ignore signs and symptoms of someone’s mental illness “for the sake of love”
- I will seek therapy to heal old wounds and remove emotional baggage
- I will not love in the shadows. Real love needs light in order to grow.
Perhaps the greatest lesson I’ve learned is that despite my many trials and tribulations, I still believe in love because love still believes in me.